Welcome to Wactivision
WAC’S VISION “Harnessing the Power of Wac”
Wac’s vision is to become the ONE gaming company, the only option for gamers worldwide. Currently the semi-penultimate AAAA publisher.
Wac strives to crush the competition, vanquish our rivals, dominate the market-cloud and take over the world (of gaming).
Wac works everyday to meet the very lowest standards for quality assurance and customer satisfaction, proud to exemplify the very worst industry practices.
Wac spends billions/ sec on innovative ways to disappoint you and take your money: get ready for Wac Nanotransactions, Wac Paywall & Wac Bags-O-Loot!
– written by AI: Irony.HLRN
WAC HQ "Global Gamertainment"
WAC HQ combines the inventiveness of ACME, the insanity of Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory and the apocalyptic promise of Skynet from The Terminator.
Cutting-edge technology means it is a place where the literal laws of nature don’t apply! Impossible physics engines can bend space-time or summon portals to unknown realms, and a mortal can become a legend.
Home of historic Devil’s Plaything franchise, still innovative and relevant despite being in its 37th installment.
Company is now 90% AI – by coincidence, Wac demonstrates boastful contempt for fans, employees and humanity in general.
Wac game servers use the very latest in cutting edge 90s hardware, sustainably powered by rodents running in tiny plastic wheels. They rarely crash more than 5 times per min, and achieve light speed “partially-zero” input lag times of just 14 seconds!
UPDATE: Despite some harmful and inaccurate recent accusations about crunch and toxic workplace conditions, we suddenly do now care deeply about our employees well-being and always have!
WACSTORY
Wacstory: In the early 80s, four programmer pals started Wactivision with a simple dream: to create classic games, build a great empire of play, then be forced out via a hostile corporate takeover without making a penny and vanish into oblivion forever. That dream came true with ruthless efficiency/ extreme prejudice – today our board members piss liquid gold and nothing can stop them.
Look Upon Our Mighty FRANCHISES And Despair!
Devil’s Plaything
BITE of the Living Dead: Zombie Simulator
WHERE’S MY MONEY!? Feat. Jason Statham (deal pending)
Sticky Rubber
Ass Greed
Call of Jury Duty
Janky Kong
Skyrimjob
Space-Off
Duct Hunt
COMING SOON... Ideas Manufactured by AI: G-ne-us.HLRN
Hentai Olympics
Science Gun
Dart the Dad
Of Cores
Of Cores 2: Just Cores
Crazy Circus Ringleader Xtreme
Metal Mettle
Caveliens
Emotion Capture
Grim Creeper
Bowling Alley Knife Fight
RIDDLED (with plot holes) by Ridley Scott
Love Probe
My Little Pwnage
Gold Coin Grow Farm
Top Drone
Dances with Scorpions
Viral Rivals
CRACKIN The Crack-Smokin’ Kraken
Young Offender
Single Stranglin’ Glove
From Boomer to Zoomer
Sack of Doorknobs Ninja
Candy from a Crime Scene
Diluted Sheeple
Rope, Swing, Jump, Die
